A funny thing happened this week

Wait. This is me we're talking about here. LOTS of funny things happened this week. LOTS of funny things happen every week.

But, this thing in particular? Quite odd. Quite unexpected.

For the first time in recent memory, I haven't hated Austin.

Now, before we jump to conclusions, I'm speaking in generalities here. My relationship with this city as a whole is as complex as my relationship to many residents of the city. Hate is certainly a strong word that isn't wholly representative of my feelings toward the entire city.

To be sure, 2008 Austin is not the city I fell in love with. And, for the longest time, I have felt suffocated by it. Trapped. Stifled.

However, as I streak up to escape velocity, I sure feel less stifled. And that's a good thing. Now I can just sit back and enjoy a bunch of Lone Star, brisket and tacos.

The 23 answers to the 23 questions I will ask everyone in order to decide if I can really love them

I've been reading a lot of Chuck Klosterman lately. I wouldn't say I think he's great. I think he's kind of me. He makes references that have to come directly from my head. And, his Killing Yourself to Live: 85% of a True Story seems a lot like something I would cook up some strange but oddly normal Friday night over drinks.

He also poses things that make me think they have to be directed at me - such as the section of Sex, Drugs and Cocoa Puffs: A Low Culture Manifesto. I wouldn't feel right (nor legal) directly copying the section. So, instead, I will just give you my answers to his questions.

The (answers to the) twenty-three questions I ask everybody I meet in order to decide if I can really love them:

1. This is a toughie. Albert Einstein's discoveries probably would have been made by now. I mean he's no Tesla or anything. Then again, how can we be sure this magician is unique? I mean, if there is only one of him in the world, then I pick him. If not, it's a push.
2. I would not attempt to do this. Not every political prisoner is innocent.
3. Hitler's skull.
4. Yes, so he will be out of the League in four years.
5. This is an interesting question. Basically, even though I dig Alice in Chains, it is effectively giving up music in your life. I listen to music all the time. So would I give that up just to keep my soulmate out of some moderate pain every few years? Man. That's the altruistic answer. So, has all the altruism been sucked out of me? Have the bastards ground me down?
6. Hell no.
7. Presidential thyroid cancer.
8. I've happily dealt with far worse than Dark Crystal.
9. Decrease.
10. I have no idea.
11. Exit the theater.
12. $100
13. Oh shit.
14. Cats would love it, as we love Peanuts.
15. Sadly, I would spend the next 14 days at work. Over the past couple months, I have realized I am actually really good at my job. And I would like to enjoy that for just a little bit longer.
16. You can't resist it. Embrace it.
17. Trust the first one.
18. Ten minutes on the moon.
19. Muscle spasm.
20. I love documentaries.
21. Two years earlier.
22. The first rumor is the most troubling.
23. Uhh. Weird?

Baby, it wont be long till I be tyin on my flyin shoes

What's scarier? Thinking you can't doing something, or figuring out you can, you just have to actually do it?

One of my favorite documentaries is Be Here to Love Me about the legendary Townes Van Zandt. There's a scene in there where Townes talks about how he was at a party. He was standing on the balcony and was possessed by the desire to feel what it was like the moment - the split second -before one fell off the balcony. Well, he deduced the only way to know that moment was to actually fall off the balcony. To not go that far with it would mean he hadn't in fact felt the moment before the fall.

I might not be at the falling moment. But I can feel the wind. And I think I can feel the moment of truth.

And I can't fucking wait.

Hold on. I'm coming.

So, what do you know?

I mean, what do you really know? A friend told me the other night that before he goes to sleep every night, he writes down one thing he learned that day. Brilliant in its simplicity.

However, this post arose from a discussion among some folks that I was privileged to be a part of. I'm directly stealing my #1 from one of them. The rest are all mine.

#1: In your professional life, only you are going to take care of you. The sooner you recognize this and begin to act accordingly, the more successful you will ultimately become.

#2: Any product or service that requires the American public to be stupid or lazy will make a fortune for someone.
#2a: Any product or service that requires them to be both stupid and lazy will turn out better than printing money.
#2b: This seems to work for TV shows, movies and political candidates, too.

#3: Just assume that no good deed goes unpunished. Has that stopped me from doing good? No. I just figure it in as the "cost of doing good" and allow myself to be pleasantly surprised when things don't turn out horribly.

#4: The Rolling Stones wrote a song for every occasion in your life.

#5: Complete and total, utterly devastating, catastrophic failure is never as bad as you think it is going to be. In fact, it can be the greatest thing that ever happens to you.

#6: Three square meals, eight glasses of water and thirty minutes of exercise a day were more than just things you learned in health class. They can change your life.

#7: Looking for someone to stand next to you at a wedding is a good way to get divorced.

#8: Nothing is more expensive than regret. Have dreams. Do something each day to get you closer to those dreams.

#9: Preparing is better than planning.

#10: I should have the guts to trust my gut more.

#11: Being vulnerable isn't being weak.

Worst kept secret ever:

I spent all day Wednesday at an epicenter for great advertising.

Speaking of it purely as a field trip, if you will, it was fantastic. I happen to be listening to Soul Singing from the Black Crowes right this second, but that's exactly what the field trip did. I'd been down. Cascading in blue without a sound. Then I traded my black feathers for a crown. You know how it goes.

OK, I guess I wasn't down. I just wasn't totally, completely sure. I'd worked in one honest to goodness, real ad agency in my life. (and a handful of grade A slapdick operations, which bored me to tears and sucked the life out of my soul) And I loved being at the "real" agency. But I had to wonder. How much of that was the people? And the atmosphere? And the clients I was blessed to work with?

I spent Wednesday in my element. Even more than I was at aforementioned "real" agency. It was awesome. It was fantastically fulfilling and envigorating. And, hopefully, profitable. If I never hear another word from them, Wednesday was a resounding success.

They do some great work. Beyond that, they have some brilliant ideas in the works.

And then, there's this douchbaggery. Thanks, assholes for making me so proud of my industry.



You're the ad people Bill Hicks was talking to.